Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
