margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
