I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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