i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
