i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
