im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
