if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
We are two peas in an std pod
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Randomize
