Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Randomize
