He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
