He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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