I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
