well he's currently spooning the coffee table
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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