I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
