He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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