the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize