my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
