so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Randomize
