1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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