Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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