I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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