addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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