Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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