i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
