Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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