So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
