when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
