Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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