i just wanna soil my oats bro
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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