I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Everyone says I win the strip club
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
tell me about the fingering
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