i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Randomize
