Fuck appropriateness.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Randomize
