Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Randomize
