I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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