your thong is hanging out like whoa
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
