Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
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