As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
It's blow job season.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
