His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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