no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
