Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
