he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
