That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
