her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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