hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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