THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
