after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
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