He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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