How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
