you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
