Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
