Walk of Shame. In a state park.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
